So Kai can not deal with change. At all. Not surprising. He is all about routine. He gets distressed when any little thing is off. Even something as small as there being no sox in his pile of clothes I lay out for him.
Having James here has been a big change for Kai. He likely figures James is here to stay. The rest of us feel James fits right in.
So we have seen the resurgence of some habits we had thought gone. Feel free to pray for us as we attempt to squash these habits again. One, non stop screaming and yelling when playing. We ask are you hurt? Are you stuck? Do you need help? No, no and no means you shouldn't be yelling. Two, constant moaning through all tasks as though everything is difficult or heavy. Three, major stuffing of food. To the point of gagging, choking and vomiting. Four, flopping to the floor when people arrive. Oy. What is that?! We tell him that is an extremely odd way to greet people.
Today at the museum the kids took off in a run to the playground. Jia and Luk ran in a straight line towards the playground. Kai took off to the right, directly towards another family and right into mud. He got stuck immediately and lost a shoe then kept going in sox. He would have liked to just keep going but he was literally stuck. Eric to the rescue. Then we took his sock off and shoe back on. Which he wasn't thrilled about. Then he went on the slide. The only thing he likes in a playground. The mud from his feet got everywhere and then he slid through it. There was also an unfortunate pee episode in the wash room. He had to ride home in his undies. He was unhappy about that too. Definitely a change to his normal day.
By the time we got home he was done. Done with new things. Done with trying to get along. He wanted tv. Then through dinner he stuffed until he vomited again. In an effort to be done to get back to the tv. We all discussed putting him to bed at 6 just to end the day for him.
I lost track of how many times he cried today. Most of the time we're not really sure what the exact reason is. Overstimulated and annoyed at change. It is impossible to create a world where his routine is exact.
School provides a routine. Summer is coming though and every single day is different. I shudder to imagine how he will manage our two weeks in October to Disneyland and a cruise. I'm planning to bring cheerios and almond milk in bulk. Might have to resort to letting him exist on that for the comfort.
He understands most of what we say but long sentences while explaining changes he just gets lost and tunes us out.
Today the mud thing was our fault we assumed he'd follow Jia and Luk. I don't think he could see. It's hard to know what is orphanage delay, what is vision related and what is cognitive development issues. He doesn't always love us hovering over him like he's a toddler but we really need to.
I'm realizing today that the girls and I leaving next Saturday for a week is really going to throw him for a tailspin. I had originally thought the boys would be thrilled to have Eric to themselves for a guys week. Fingers crossed he doesn't notice we're not here.
He does have lots of happy moments in between. There is joy every day. His emotions are totally out of control. Totally expected for a child adopted at his age. We're guessing he didn't have to deal emotionally with so much in China. Where his day was likely extremely regimented.
